8 Signs That, Together, Guarantee a Woman is Into You
Whether it’s catching each other’s eyes from across the club, really hitting it off at a gathering with friends, or striking up conversation after a chance encounter, it’s hard to know if the woman you’re really connecting with feels, well – that kind of connection. A spark that says ‘let’s be together.’
You don’t want to be pushy or make her feel uncomfortable. If you’re already friends, you certainly don’t want to misinterpret signals and ruin the relationship. But if something’s there – if she’s into you – shouldn’t you act on it?
The answer is yes. But your options are:
– Kamikaze-ing the whole thing by asking point blank if she digs you, which could do more harm than good if you’re wrong.
– Or save yourself some embarrassment. There are certain signs a woman who’s disinterested won’t show – and a woman who’s totally into you definitely will.
Of course, it’s worth noting each of these cues can’t be taken as gospel all on their own. No one sign means you’re a shoe-in. Just as you’ll find in any game of poker, “tells” change from person to person. But compound these “tells” together and you have a very clear green light: she thinks you’re hot stuff. Make a move, champ!
1. Serious Eye Contact – Just Start Looking for it, and You’ll Know
This is the most important cue of all. Why? Because it’s instinct, because girls are self-aware about it, and because it’s dead simple to pick up on.
Being pestered by someone you don’t like? Avoid eye contact. Eventually they’ll get bored and walk away. Some women do this when they’re only half interested, as though scouting the area for a worthy alternative.
However, if you’re wondering, “is she into me?” take crucial note of how long she holds your gaze. If she’s low-key attracted to you, she’ll maintain strong eye contact automatically – because she’s entirely focused on and interested in you whether she consciously knows it or not. If she knows she wants you, then you can be certain the eye contact will be purposeful. Break this eye contact and the connection of conversation, attraction, or attention fizzles out. If she seems dead set on not letting that happen, then you’re golden.
2. Got a Secret, Can You Keep it?
Sharing private information shows a degree of trust, which they wouldn’t express to someone they plan on never seeing again. No, not their phone number or address – that embarrassing time they ran into a glass door or the fact that they’re mortally terrified of mini Coke cans. It also shows a willingness to continue the relationship. They want you to know more about them so a stronger connection can be fostered.
Although… There’s a clear difference between a woman who wants a trash receptacle for her feelings – and a woman who’s well-grounded but is sharing something private because she likes you. How to tell if she’s into you? If it’s your first time meeting her, the distinction comes in how private that information really is. Do her friends know that embarrassing story? If the odds are high, then take comfort – she’s adding you to her social circle. If she’s a ball of tears, you may be her first venting buddy, and that doesn’t guarantee a connection.
3. Playing With Her Hair
A classic, but well proven. When a woman plays with her hair while speaking with you, it’s a clear sign she’s either purposefully sending a signal – or you stir her up in a uniquely tantalizing way, which is being expressed through unconscious body language. Of course, you have to read other cues to decide if this is general discomfort, but as soon as you see her fingers running through her tresses or a casual hair flip, be alert. This could be the beginning of your green light.
Flipping her hair over her shoulder bares her collarbone and neck (and even if she’s wearing a high-collar, she’s still removing one barrier). In the art of body language, this depicts trust or attraction, since these are vulnerable and somewhat private parts of the body.
By running her hand through her hair or twisting it around her fingers, she’s drawing your eye to both. Since a woman’s hands and tresses are also some of the most beautiful parts of them – and they know it – they want you to admire.
Lastly, she’s creating motion – and natural human instinct is to follow motion. If you’re in a group, this will unconsciously draw your attention to her over anyone else who is merely still.
4. She’s Facing You
Much like playing with her hair, facing you entirely when you’re seated or standing up shows she’s interested and trusting of you. How to know if a girl is interested in you? Watch how she holds herself.
If she’s turned away, she may be looking for an escape – or at least something more interesting. If she keeps her shoulder to you, this may be a defensive gesture, hoping to keep you at a distance until you get bored, she finds something better, or simply because she’s not interested enough to put in the effort. When she’s facing you, however, and her body is as well, she’s devoting all her attention to you. She’s into you, dude.
5. She Seeks Out Time With You
A popular misconception is: if a woman seems really enthused about talking with you, it means she’s interested. She smiles, she laughs, you both have a great rapport – it’s a good sign, right?
Yes and no. When a woman is interested in you, she will hold up a strong conversation. However, some women are more conversational than others and will strike up an exciting chat with just about anyone. It can send mixed signals if you’re correlating “interaction” with “attraction.”
What turns this uncertain signal into a clear sign? How much she seeks you out, and how soon. If you’re just friends, a meet-up now and then won’t be strange. If you’ve been friends for months, touching your arm now and then doesn’t mean anything but familiarity. But if these hangouts are once or twice a week, she’s usually the first to call or text, she doesn’t mind close proximity to you, and she’s sharing secrets or somewhat private thoughts?Within the first week or month? It’s worth making a formal request to leave the friend-zone – these are signs the woman likes you more than a friend.
6. She Teases You
Another classic sign she is interested.
If she thinks you’re cool but only has intentions of being your friend, she might stress the “polite” half of the interaction to keep things sweet. If she’s not interested in you at all, she’ll be aloof to lose your attention. However, if you’ve caught her fancy, you can be sure a certain degree of teasing will come into play. This is her way of testing your intentions and getting a feel for your sense of humor.
For some, it might even be a defensive technique against how much they like you; they don’t want to appear too available or aren’t sure what to do with these new feelings, so the alternative is to be a little tougher than normal. Just be sure these are ‘playful’ teasings, and not actually offensive. Otherwise she’s actively trying to drive you away – or is just mean and not worth your time.
7. When a Woman is Interested in You, She Initiates Physical Contact
Think of it this way. Would you throw your arm around a random stranger? No, but you might around your best bro. Because you like them, are comfortable with them, and trust them. It’s crossing the barrier from ‘strangers’ to ‘friends’ – and with a woman, could move to something more.
Brushing you, playfully punching your arm, pushing you, or rubbing against you in a friendly, non-suggestive way are all signs she’s comfortable enough to engage in physical contact. If she wasn’t interested, you could be certain that both consciously and subconsciously, she wouldn’t be breaching that barrier. Breaching the ‘no touch’ rule of any acquaintance relationship is a sign a girl is attracted to you; she wants you to feel confident in getting closer to her as well.
8. She Sends Bored or Open-Ended Texts
This is one of the most underappreciated signs a girl is into you. She likely has girlfriends she texts when she’s bored, or on a whim with random plans or thoughts. Who doesn’t she text rather than them? Someone she’s not interested in or someone she’s only known for a few weeks – unless that someone is on her mind frequently.
Random texts out of the blue – and especially if they’re first-texts, not a reply – means she wants to have more time in your life. She thinks you’re fun, intelligent, or charming enough to crave your company versus anyone else in her social circle. Just a random “How are you?” doesn’t mean much – but a “I’m bored, want to do something?” indicates she’s comfortable with and intrigued by you.