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7 Ways Relationships Change Between Your 20s and 30s

How Relationships Change Between Your 20s and 30s

Many people believe that, just like fine wine, relationships get better with age. When dating in your 20s, you were probably much more carefree and in no hurry to settle down with one person. It’s likely that marriage and commitment were very much on hold at this point in your life. However, you can expect your relationships to change greatly in your 30s. Most people are much more emotionally balanced at this age and have a better understanding of what it is they want. Although, added responsibilities usually mean they have less time to find it. Here are some things that change over time between your 20s and 30s.

What you prioritize is different

People in their 30s often find that what they prioritize when looking for a partner is a lot different to when they were in their 20s. When you’re a carefree twentysomething, you want excitement that gives you that delicious feeling of butterflies in your stomach. If a relationship is becoming boring, you may look for a way out, as it’s no longer giving you the buzz you crave at this time in your life. In your 30s, you may be looking to find a partner to who can give you a sense of stability. Passion is still important, but it’s not everything when you’re looking to begin a strong relationship that lasts. You accept relationship ups and downs are part of being in a couple.

You’re no longer afraid to be yourself

Lots of people in their 20s spend their time trying to be something that they think the opposite sex want. Women pretend to be the “cool girl” to please guys, but by the time they’re in their 30s, they’re much more comfortable in their own skin and have more of a ‘this is me, take me or leave me’ attitude. When you learn to be yourself, it’ll become much more likely that you’ll find a partner who’s right for you in your 30s, rather than someone who wants you for who you’re pretending to be.

You’re more able to accept ‘baggage’

When you were in your 20s, you may have avoided dating anyone who had too much baggage. Baggage can come in various forms, including an ex-wife or husband, or even children. It can be difficult to accept that not everyone is as carefree as you are when you’re young. However, by the time you’re in your 30s and you’ve experienced more of life, you know that everyone has a past. You’re better able to look past baggage that people are carrying and appreciate who they really are.

You stop overanalyzing

Chances are there when you were in your 20s, you’d spend hours with your friends after a date discussing everything that happened, including what he said, how he acted, what he wore, and so on. Now in your 30s, it’s like you just don’t have time for all that. You’re far too busy with life to analyze every element of a date. This is a good thing as it helps you to keep a level head about dating.

You have sex less often (but you enjoy it more!)

Sex is a lot different in your 30s compared to your 20s. Twentysomethings are still finding out what they do and don’t like. It’s still relatively new and they tend to take every opportunity to jump between the sheets. In your thirties, you may not have as much sex, but chances are that it’s a lot better. You know your body more and know what it is that you want from a lover. I consider that although work commitments and greater responsibilities mean that sex often takes a back seat in your 30s, “the upside is that when you do get some alone time, you are more likely to make the most of it”.

You can take rejection

In your twenties, being rejected by someone you like probably felt like the worst thing in the world. In fact, you no doubt spent days or even weeks asking yourself why someone could possibly not want to date you. Whereas when it comes to finding love in your 30s, you care less about being rejected. You’re mature enough to know that you’re not everyone’s cup of tea, and that’s fine. In fact, you’re probably glad they let you know right at the beginning, as you don’t have time to waste dating someone who’s never going to be right for you.

You search for love in different places

Looking for love in your 20s may well have entailed heading out to a local nightclub in the hope of meeting someone special. You hit the club not just to meet someone, but to relax and catch up with friends, probably knocking back a few drinks whilst you were at it. When you’re a thirtysomething, you avoid clubs like the plague, knowing all too well that you’re unlikely to meet your future partner in a dark and noisy environment where everyone is getting hammered. You’re likely to give online dating a try, especially since all your friends are choosing to look for love online too.

Hopefully, this article has given you some insight into the relationships changes that are likely to take place when you enter your 30s. Don’t expect it to be a sudden thing. It’s not as if your 30th birthday will hit and suddenly everything about your dating life will be different. But you’re likely to notice some subtle changes about the way you go about finding love in your 30s. And the good news is that most of these changes aren’t bad. The biggest changes will probably be in your own attitude. At this stage in your life, you know what you want, and you aren’t afraid to go after it!

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Author: Alex Reddle

Alex Reddle – online dating specialist. He got his Psychological degree at Kent State University. He specializes in the subject of Interpersonal relationships, love, finding a partner. He likes to study human behavior and ways of communication. Being Chief Editor of Flirt.com blog he has conducted a big research in this sphere.

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